How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
It's shark week go big or go home
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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