Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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