he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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