who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
A+ Viking dick
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
