I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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