Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
