whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Randomize
