Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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