Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
