is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
A bitchslap is in order.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
