So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
