i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize
