i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
