he puts the penis in happiness.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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