I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
