love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Terrible idea I love it
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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