im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
