Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
