You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
