Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
