I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
