I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
