What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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