You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I would fuck him just for his dog
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
