he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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