What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
