I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
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