I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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