turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
