Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
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