I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I party with great urgency now.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
