you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
