man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
