Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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