im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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