His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
