We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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