Having a random hookup so left but love u
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
