omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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