piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
