Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
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