Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
try to milk me bitch
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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