this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
