Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
