Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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