can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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