Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
