dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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