Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
