Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
